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Why are you trying to be femenine in the first place?  If being femenine is not your thing, then do not push yourself to it.  If your attempt to be feminine will give you  a better life, or better work, better pay and a peace of mind, then go ahead and do it.  But it is still you who knows you and who can decide which is better for you.  If attempting to be feminine does not yield to something productive, pleasing, and satisfying, then do not continue your attempts anymore.