• Come and join our girl community by registering for free and start discussing about girl topics, fashion, relationships...

Does your spouse/boyfriend ever talk about previous girlfriends and relationships?

M

Mom4ever

Member
Joined
Jun 2, 2011
Messages
140
Does your significant other ever talk fondly about past relationships or girlfriends? Does he ever talk harshly about an ex-girlfriend? Does he ever compare you to former girlfriends or contrast the difference? Is it really healthy to talk about past relationships or does it cause more heartache and pain?
 
Werbung:
My husband and I started of as friends, it's not like an instant romance so before we got together, we exchanged a couple of stories about significant exe's, and when we finally got together, it would hurt me, for some reason, thinking I knew too much about his past girlfriend and that I may not be as (generally) good as she is. He never really mentioned her anymore though, but we would stumble across numerous things that would remind me, he was particularly careful about things like that since he knows I have the potential to get really upset about it. I realized though that after 7 years of being together I became a lot more secure, and recently he has been able to tell me things that he would not dare mentioning before, like for instance (and this was just a couple of moths back), we passed by this house on our way going to his uncle's house, I knew that his ex girlfriend actually resides in the same village that he was living in before and I really wanted to find exactly where back then ( i don't know why )and suddenly on that day he told me that "THAT HOUSE was actually her house" and it just made me laugh thinking that for years now, I kept seeing the house cause it was on the route going to his uncle's place where we frequently visit. So, I guess it would hurt you for a certain time, but since I saw how he tried to avoid mentioning anything about her for me, I became fine. I think what would be offensive is that after a lot of years being together, he would still discuss about his ex with so much enthusiasm, it would probably make me think that he never really got over her or their relationship.
 
My guy doesn't mention his past a lot at all. Though sometimes, he does talk about his childhood, though very infrequently. I think for him it's all a very painful page in his history. And, I respect him enough to not press him to talk about things. I try not to make him jealous by talking about anything in my past that might hurt him. We make allowances for each other.
 
Maybe it is our nature as girl to talk about our past, but for men it is sort of touching their ego specially when they saw us happy while talking about our past relationship. I remember my boyfriend before got angry because i was talking about my ex boyfriend he told me that i look so happy remembering him so why don't i call him and have dinner together, it was too late for me to realize that men doesn't want to hear anything from the past.
 
Like the second poster, me and my husband were friends for how many years before we get married. So, everything in the past were already been told, the past relationships, childhood experiences, everything. I guess it is good for both of you to share the past so that you will each personality. The past always affecting the future and if you knew what he/she was and her/his experiences you will understand why your partner acted that way. My husband has a bad feeling towards because of his experiences of not being appreciated despite of everything he did. Him telling me that story now will do my part to appreciate all his effort and hard-work. As much as possible we want to be open with each other though at first talk those thing might be painful. On the other, he never compared me to his past relationship and I never did too because we both believe that each person is different . There was a time that our topic were purely more about our past and we had fun talking about it. Of course, there are teasing, misunderstanding and fighting in between.:) But it went all good and every time we discuss it again no more pain and all were only the past and we learned some lesson about it.
 
Me and my boyfriend have promised not to talk about our pasts, we both have been completely honest about what's happened, but we just don't like hearing it, as it's awful knowing someone else has been with your partner, so we just don't talk about it and focus on what we have now :D It's the best way in my opinion, it doesn't cause arguments or makes jealousy
 
Like other posters above, my boyfriend and I were best of friends. :) So I know almost all his girlfriend. They were extremely pretty and I'm of average. :( We don't really talk much of the past... we focus on what we have today... and the people we're with.. which is each other. :D
 
We don't really talk about our past relationships. We mention them at some instances but only to associate with a topic that we're currently discussion. Is it healthy, probably. There's really nothing wrong with it, I guess.
 
bethanyparkin said:
Me and my boyfriend have promised not to talk about our pasts, we both have been completely honest about what's happened, but we just don't like hearing it, as it's awful knowing someone else has been with your partner, so we just don't talk about it and focus on what we have now :D It's the best way in my opinion, it doesn't cause arguments or makes jealousy
Click to expand...

That's a healthier way of doing things, cause if the past is constantly being brought up, where he is comparing you to other girls, then it would produce hard feelings and arguments. Glad to hear you have this issue worked out.
 
No, we never talk about the past seriously. Sometimes I would tell him that I saw his ex girl friend and he just responds "okay" and the topic ends there. Our past was very complicated and we do not really want to go to that phase.
 
Like several of the others, I was friends with my husband before we started dating, so I knew about both his previous serious relationships and several flings as well. He still talks about them sometimes and it's never really bothered me. I'd rather know than not know and be surprised when I found out, and anyway, it's an interesting picture into his past before he came to this country.
 
My ex husband used to talk about his ex some in a rather negative way. I don't really like to hear too much about past relationships because I know I would not want someone I dated talking about me to strangers. Things that happened with other partners should be kept private, no matter what the outcome of that relationship was. If I was in a relationship with someone who kept comparing me to other girls then maybe he should go back to that girl.
 
My significant other and I have talked about past relationships, but I think the only one that mattered to him was his girlfriend prior to me and the only past relationship that mattered to me was the one prior to him as well. We try not to bring up the past too much because when it does come up, I think it hurts the both of us a little bit. But I think my main issue is that I would prefer to know all the details so that I won't be surprised to find something out later.
 
My husband and I have talked about past relationships but he has never really gone into detail about his past relationships. He definitely knows more about me and my relationships more than I know about his. It's not really something we dwell on or think about, as it's not important anymore.
 
Werbung:
We don't really talk about our previous relationships. The past should stay in the past. He mentioned some girls and I mentioned about my ex a few times but we don't share any details, I think it's unnecessary. Also, I'm pretty sure it would hurt me - I'm so jealous:(
 
Back
Top