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So, here's an update on what's happened the past few days.

 

I got a good shirt (the third one I linked in my other topic). Since my friend was the one who wanted me to get one, I decided to wear it for when she came over. I wasn't sure how I wanted to look, so I just buttoned it up all the way and tucked it in. I think she liked it that way, because when she came over she said "You look cute." Admittedly, I blushed. We went up to my room and chatted for a bit. She then said "That's a really nice shirt." but she said that while... handling my shirt? I'm not sure how to describe it. It was like she was trying to feel my shirt. I said thanks but I was a little distracted by what she was doing. She slowly ran her fingers down my shirt a time or two. Then she said "I'm sleepy" and lied on my bed. I thought we were going to take a nap so I lied with her. We were pretty close though. She also was staring at me, smiling. After a little bit, she held my face and kissed me. Her lips were really soft. Honestly, it felt good. I was speechless. I think she could tell, because she giggled and then got on top of me. She kissed me again. We kept kissing. After a while she started rubbing my chest. Combined with the kissing, it felt good. My parents were gone for the most part, but they came home and we stopped. She left.

 

I've thought about it for a while, and I think I'm definitely gay. Kissing her felt good. It was my first kiss, but I felt something that day.