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I know how you feel, I've been feeling so disconnected from my boyfriend during the last few months, he has said things I'll never forget.  Things that have not only hurt me, but the relationship as well.  Up until a few weeks ago I don't think I'd  have a crush while in a relationship, but now I know I can, lol.  I've this crush on a guy I became friends with recently...  so yeah, I don't want to cheat either!!  And I'm pretty sure I won't, even tho I know my boyfriend has been such a undeserving prick, who doesn't value me and let his family abuse me some months ago. But still...

All I can tell you is that the way you are feeling and even expressing about your actual boyfriend is a huge red flag!  Be careful, it seems you are falling out of love with him.