20 CLUES A WOMAN SHOULD CALL IT A NIGHT...
1. I have absolutely no idea where my purse is.
2. I believe that dancing with my arms overhead and wiggling my butt while yelling WOO-HOO is truly the sexiest dance move around.
3. I've suddenly decided I want to kick someone's ass and honestly believe I could do it too.
4. In my last trip to I realize I now look more like Tammy Faye Baker than the goddess I was just four hours ago.
5 . I drop my 3:00 a.m. burrito on the floor (which I'm eating even though I'm not the least bit hungry), pick it up and carry on eating it.
6. I start crying and telling everyone I see that I love them sooooo
7. There are less than three hours before I'm due to start work.
8. I've found a deeper/spiritual side to the geek sitting next to me.
9. The man I'm flirting with used to be my 5th grade teacher.
10 . The urge to take off articles of clothing, stand on a table and sing or dance becomes strangely overwhelming.
11. My eyes just don't seem to want to stay open on their own so I keep them half closed and think it looks exotically sexy.
12. I've suddenly taken up smoking and become really good at it.
13. I yell at the bartender, who (I think) cheated me by giving me just lemonade, but that's just because I can no longer taste the gin.
14. I think I'm in bed, but my pillow feels strangely like the kitchen
15. I start every conversation with a booming, quote DON'T take this the WRONG WAY but...
16. I fail to notice that the toilet lid's down when I sit on it.
17. My hugs begin to resemble wrestling take-down moves.
18. I'm tired so I just sit on the floor (wherever I happen to be standing) and take a quick nap.
19. I begin leaving the buttons open on my button fly pants to cut down on the time I'm in the bathroom away from my drink.
20. I take my shoes off because I believe it's their fault that I'm having problems walking straight. You probably laughed at the ones that apply (or applied) to you.
