When should you let go?

[Chavaun Jones]

I have been with my fiancee/boyfriend now for 8, going on 9 years. We have two children together and for the most part, have made a life with each other, but here lately, I seem to be noticing more and more that i don't like.
I used to be able to deal with and swallow a lot of things, but after so long, I'm just ready to say 'screw it' and call it quits. I hate thinking like this because my children adore their father. I was raised without mine, and while I think I turned out okay, I am unwilling to wish that feeling of
empty, hollowness on my my own children. I feel like it's my duty to make our family strong, but I wonder, how much am I supposed to forgive and overlook?
I'll be 30 in 10 days, so I'm still marginally young, though I have no desire to enter back into the dating game. I'm wondering, how much have any of you 'suffered' through? How much is too much?

 

[chelly]

Depends on how much he is investing into the relationship to make it work. Ask yourself, is he faithful? Does he take care of all of you? If the relationship is suffering, never suffer just because your kids need a father. Even if you had to break up, he will always be their father. You shouldn't be the only one contributing efforts to make it work. It takes two. Don't worry about your age. As long as you guys are taking care of your children together, you can focus on you & the kids. For your kids sake, wouldn't be so quick to jump into the dating game eitherif you decided to leave your current one. If his habits are small, then some can be worked out but it's up to him, because you can't change him. If you wanted to be married & he is with you that long & hasn't married you yet, then you may consider moving on if you are not comfortable there.

 

[jenniferb7890]

I wouldn't worry about your kids so much. My mom stayed with my dad for years after things turned south in an effort to give both my sister and me a stable home environment. But we knew she was unhappy, and the house was really tense all the time. What's best for your kids is what's best for you. If you're truly unhappy, believe me, they know it. When my parents finally divorced the house felt so much lighter, and I didn't feel anxious when coming home anymore.

If your unhappy, then something needs to be done. Tell your guy. If he doesn't want to work to make you happy then he doesn't want you enough to have you. But talk to him in an honest and open way. You could find out that he's unhappy, too, and then you both can work it out together.