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Is it silly to be crazy about a guy just for his looks?

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by Cookie97, Sep 24, 2014.

  1. Cookie97

    Cookie97 New Member

    There is a guy who started in my class a couple weeks ago, and he is so ridiculously good-looking that it's unreal.
    Right when he introduced himself for the class I saw a lot of the girls staring at him with great interest and smiled at everything he said, and he very quickly started to get question from several of them, and has been encouraged to be with them shortly after that.
    And I have noticed that they often try to get physical contact with him, like fixing his hair or sitting very lose to him in purpose, touch him on the arms all the time and so on.
    And I feel the same way about him myself, I just cannot stop staring at him when I see him, even if he notices it.
    And if he happens to stand next to me then I become extremely nervous, glance at him all the time and try my best to look as good as possible for him.

    Is it stupid to be this crazy about a him when I only know about his looks?
    I mean, he seems to be kind and have a good personality as well, but the only thing that really maters to me on that point is that he is not unfriendly or threatening in any way.
    As long as he is a sensible person, then I would easily catch him as soon as I got the slightest chance.
    But I feel pretty stupid for being so obsessed with his insane beauty - I have even tried dressing a bit "sexy" just to make him look at me more (not in a cheap way or anything, just the typical things, like tight cleavage and slim leggings and so on), and this seems to make him check me out a little bit, but that might just make him wanna have me for one night, but I want to keep him for much longer and try to get to know him after that.
    But I am way too shy to even approach him, and I feel like those other girls will steal him at any time, or may have even done so already.
    What should I do about this? :unsure:
  2. Trellum

    Trellum Member

    No, it isn't. It actually is more normal than you think, it's almost an instinct. Most people react like that to someone they find attractive. Guys are way worse than us girls in that aspect, in the sense they are more open about it and even proud of it.

    It's going to be hard for him to notice you if you don't get close to him, after all he is already surrounded by girls! You will definitely need to talk to him, you have a lot competence who isn't afraid of getting close to him.
  3. Cookie97

    Cookie97 New Member

    Yes, he seems to enjoy being so popular, and if two girls sit beside him on both sides he can put his arms around them and they would seem really shy, but they definitely welcome it.

    I am just a little afraid that he might have been taken - I mean, these girls have told him several times in a half-joking way that he is smoking hot (he is about 6'4 and muscular, but it's his face that truly makes him extremely irresistible) and check him, smile at him and wink kindly at him really often, and every time he says something they will all immediately start listening to him, agree with him about pretty much everything he says, giggle a whole lot etc.
    And if he seems even remotely thoughtful about something they will start asking him with sugar-sweet voice what he's thinking about, try their very best to make him happy again, and tell him that it's alright if he is quiet for a while, and so on.
    All of the girls who are with him are very cute and attractive, with beautiful curves and they seem to dress "sexy" much more often after this guy came to our school, so they are all probably trying to get him in any way they can.
    So isn't there a huge risk that some of them have invited him home, and wouldn't it be very tempting for him to say yes to that?
    Last edited: Sep 24, 2014
  4. Cookie97

    Cookie97 New Member

    Yep, but it still feels weird to desire someone so much and see him be so popular pretty much only because of his looks.
    But sure, this particular guy is indescribably hot, like way over any guy I have ever seen (celebrities included) - I find myself gasping a bit every time I see him, and I start staring without helping it.
    So maybe those other girls feel like me as well, and are so physically attracted to him that they focus on trying to get him laid first of all.
  5. Trellum

    Trellum Member

    I know what you mean, but our society gives too much importance to looks, whether we like it or not. I think what those girls have is call infatuation, it's similar to love, but it's a very superficial feeling based only on the way a person looks or other superficial aspects. I have done the same ;) There are guys I find extremely attractive, but I know for sure they're not my type. I really think you should try to get to know him :) Try talking to him more and see how he reacts, don't be afraid to be a bit daring, he is surely pretty used to it! I mean... look at those girls! You need to be a bit more outgoing and let him know you like him, no shame in that ;)
  6. Trellum

    Trellum Member

    Yes, honestly there definitely is a huge chance a girl or several ones have already asked him that! Sadly that's the problem with hot guys like that, he seems to be what's in in your school right now, but... what kind of guy do you think he is? Do you think he is the kind of guy who likes to be in the spot light and enjoy the attention and the things he might get as a result of being so attractive? Or do you think he is just a very kind down to earth guy who can't say no to those girls pestering him?

    It really depends on the kind of guy he is... some guys don't like that kind of girls! But others just want to get as many girls as they can in their beds. Others aren't like that at all! From what you have seen... what kind of guy do you think he is? I mean, I'm sure he knows those girls are not really interested in everything he says... they're just too distracted with his amazing looks!

    When I was younger I never liked when guys just agreed with everything I said, it was more than obvious they weren't even listening to me and only cared about my looks... not cared about me as a person or getting to know me... That annoyed me, but again... I'm a girl; one that thinks a lot.
  7. Cookie97

    Cookie97 New Member

    Yes, well he seems to be kind to them and everything, but he can also be quite fliry to them when he feels like it.
    They also seem to try to get him in several ways - for example, one of the girls was wearing some new "hot" clothes one day, like a very tight red blouse and shimmering black leggings, and she stood in front of the guy while he was sitting down and just asked him "do you think this looks good on me?" and turned around.
    He said "it looks wonderful" and she smiled and said thanks.
    Then when she sat down beside him he noticed that her blouse had one button loose, and fixed that for her - and while doing that his hands were literally resting on her breasts, but she just let him fix that and looked at him the whole time.
    So I would guess he knows that he is free to check them out and touch them if he wants to.
    He is definitely allowed to look at them, I have caught him looking at my breasts a couple times for perhaps 3-4 seconds, and my only reaction is like "wow... he is enjoying me...!".
    I never found him rude or anything at all, he knows that he can do those things and he knows that I absolutely love it, since I feel all warm and hopeful whenever he does that.
    And also, he has caught me checking out his body countless times, so he has the right to gawk at me himself if he wants to. ;)

    My biggest fear is of course that he would dump me very soon after I have caught him.
    I mean, I am not actually "in love with him" yet, but it would be extremely tough to have someone like him and then get dumped - I would probably not be able to get anything done at school and just feel a huge abstinence for him all the time - like I said, this guy is way beyond "extremely hot", he is on such a level that it makes me shaky just to see him.
    But that's my goal right now, and I will certainly try to learn to know him better when we have had some private time together. ^^
    So, what's the best and most sensible way to make him wanna go and have some "fun" with me?
  8. Trellum

    Trellum Member

    Well, he seems to be quite touchy! He truly seems to enjoy the attention and he knows he can get what he wants from women, so if you really want to take the step forward... well, you should try to be more direct, but in a flirty and nice way. Try to talk to him more, look at him all the time and touch his arms when you see him. Let him help you with things, men love that, they love to feel manly and useful. Don't overdo the compliments tho, some guys like the chase and don't find it so attractive when you serve yourself in a silver tray.

    Again, your tactic will vary depending on his personality. So far I think he knows he can get what he wants, he loves the attention and might not be very mature. So I hope you don't fall for him before you get to know him well! He sounds a bit like a player, but I might be wrong.
  9. Cookie97

    Cookie97 New Member

    Not sure if he is a player, but he seems polite to the girls who flirt with him, and doesn't seem arrogant or anything like that.

    The tricky thing about him is that he is so hot that it is almost scary.
    Of course, I have seen "super-hot" guys before, but this guy in my class is still way more attractive than that.
    I never get used to it, I pretty much gasp and stare at him every single time I see him.
    And of course, a lot of the girls at school feel the same way about him, tell him repeatedly how good-looking he is and such things, and it makes me really nervous.
    I am still too shy to approach him, although I have said hi to him and smiled a few times.

    I feel like it would be really risky to get together with him, since he would always have so many opportunities every day without trying himself at all.
    But I still feel an enormous desire for him.
  10. Cookie97

    Cookie97 New Member

    Well, I eventually ended up having sex with him.
    It is a pretty long story, but it was actually me and another girl with him, since both of us followed him home to see how he lived, and the other girl started trying to kiss him when they were alone for a few minutes and then things escalated very quickly.
    I feel a little weird about it, although I am still pretty hyper about what we did.
    But I'm not sure if he wants to be with anyone of us, I have asked him if we could be alone together some time, and he says that he will think about it...?
  11. gemini29

    gemini29 New Member

    Looks can be deceiving. Of course all the other girls will throw themselves at him but you want to be the girl that stand out. That's different from all the rest. That's being herself and not being a follower and doing what other girls are doing. I know you're shy but take a deep breath and count to five and introduce yourself. That shows that you are above all the rest.
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