SarahLizzie
Member
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2012
- Messages
- 72
This may sound like a small problem once I explain it, but it has many underlying meanings to me.
First I am going to give you some quick background on the situation. my boyfriend has 4 children from a previous marriage; I have one daughter from a previous relationship, and we have one together. Now we do not have his 4 children on a full time basis, up until 2 months ago, we only had them not he weekends.
Since we would only have his four children on the weekends, we decided to work opposite work schedules to avoid paying for babysitting for our 21 month old daughter. Typically he works mon-fri 8am-5pm. I work at the same restaurant, so when he gets done at 5pm I go in to work until 11pm or 12AM, plus I double saturdays and sundays.
About 2 months ago his ex-wife started a new job, that has her working every other weekend, and during the week she works 3pm - 12am. So due to her work schedule and the original visitations arrangements, she would never see her children. So we switched to have the kids every other weekend, and the weekends we do not have the children he takes them a few nights during the week. When this switch occurred, my boyfriend promised he would not start to work weekends or change his availability, so my availability was not affected. (When I am home I do freelance writing as a part-time. So I have a set routine in order to get everything accomplished each day.)
Yesterday I had the day off, and my boyfriend worked a double shift. He came home to inform me that next Saturday I am going to have off because he offered to work. This enrages me. The nights and weekends are my time at work, and I refuse to let my normal work schedule be messed with so he can do as he pleases. It will throw too many monkey wrenches in the system.
It angers me that he doing exactly what he told me he would not do to me. I know most people are like "you should be happy to get weekends off here and there" but I am not. Weekends are the bulk of my hours, which is when I need to get them in. This way I can have a week night or two for with my children, and to help my kindergardener with her homework.
I do not know how to let my boyfriend know I am extremely angry about this. The only thing that is holding me back, is how angry I am. I do not want to start a fight, but I fear that is where it will lead. For me it is more like, as soon as he does not have his 4 children, he has no other responsibilities. Or that is how this makes me feel. Just because he is not with all six children, he still has the responsibility of the other two while I am work. Changing my working schedule is going to have a negative impact on my ability to put as much time into my writing work. If the writing work slows down, so will the extra income I am earning.
Sorry for ranting so long. I had a lot to get off my chest.
First I am going to give you some quick background on the situation. my boyfriend has 4 children from a previous marriage; I have one daughter from a previous relationship, and we have one together. Now we do not have his 4 children on a full time basis, up until 2 months ago, we only had them not he weekends.
Since we would only have his four children on the weekends, we decided to work opposite work schedules to avoid paying for babysitting for our 21 month old daughter. Typically he works mon-fri 8am-5pm. I work at the same restaurant, so when he gets done at 5pm I go in to work until 11pm or 12AM, plus I double saturdays and sundays.
About 2 months ago his ex-wife started a new job, that has her working every other weekend, and during the week she works 3pm - 12am. So due to her work schedule and the original visitations arrangements, she would never see her children. So we switched to have the kids every other weekend, and the weekends we do not have the children he takes them a few nights during the week. When this switch occurred, my boyfriend promised he would not start to work weekends or change his availability, so my availability was not affected. (When I am home I do freelance writing as a part-time. So I have a set routine in order to get everything accomplished each day.)
Yesterday I had the day off, and my boyfriend worked a double shift. He came home to inform me that next Saturday I am going to have off because he offered to work. This enrages me. The nights and weekends are my time at work, and I refuse to let my normal work schedule be messed with so he can do as he pleases. It will throw too many monkey wrenches in the system.
It angers me that he doing exactly what he told me he would not do to me. I know most people are like "you should be happy to get weekends off here and there" but I am not. Weekends are the bulk of my hours, which is when I need to get them in. This way I can have a week night or two for with my children, and to help my kindergardener with her homework.
I do not know how to let my boyfriend know I am extremely angry about this. The only thing that is holding me back, is how angry I am. I do not want to start a fight, but I fear that is where it will lead. For me it is more like, as soon as he does not have his 4 children, he has no other responsibilities. Or that is how this makes me feel. Just because he is not with all six children, he still has the responsibility of the other two while I am work. Changing my working schedule is going to have a negative impact on my ability to put as much time into my writing work. If the writing work slows down, so will the extra income I am earning.
Sorry for ranting so long. I had a lot to get off my chest.
